"Here at the End of All Things"

  • user warning: Table 'tuttles.date_format_types' doesn't exist query: SELECT dft.type, dft.title, dft.locked FROM date_format_types dft ORDER BY dft.title in /home/public/sites/all/modules/date/date_api.module on line 2098.
  • user warning: Table 'tuttles.date_format_locale' doesn't exist query: SELECT format, type, language FROM date_format_locale in /home/public/sites/all/modules/date/date_api.module on line 2227.

With apologies to J.R.R. Tolkien for borrowing his phrasing for my title, I sit here and write this article having just learned that 219 elected men and women have voted to end quality health care in America and drive up taxes for all of us.

Why are we still here? And when I say “we”, I mean “Texas”. I say we’ve ignored the wishes of Sam Houston long enough. He never wanted us to get into this relationship to begin with and now he’s looking pretty prescient. Like that girl you dated junior year, it’s time to say, “We’ve had some good times and some bad times, but—over all—this isn’t working out. So let’s just call it off here and go our separate ways while we’re still friends.”

At the very least, it’s time to follow Idaho’s lead (when was the last time you heard someone say that?) and sue the Feds on the ground that that pesky little doc called the “Constitution” says that the powers not enumerated to the federal government by the Constitution belong to the states. Since said Constitution says nothing about the Fed having the power to make anyone purchase a product they don’t want, we should have a pretty good case. (If not, secede! But I repeat myself.)

One of the crazy things about all this is that we have the greatest health care in the world. I got to experience it first hand recently when my wife had to have surgery in Amarillo earlier this month. We were treated excellently and the medical professionals were all pros. And you know what? We walked right into the doctor’s office without a stitch of health insurance to our names and almost nothing in the bank and they still treated my wife (like a queen, if you want to know).

Here’s the dirty little secret, though: it was expensive but not as expensive as if we’d had health insurance. We were quoted a price of several thousand dollars for the hospital’s part of the surgery and asked what insurance we had. We answered, “None” and—zip!—they knocked 30% off the bill right then and there! Want to know why your insurance is so expensive? It’s not because of the insurance companies. It’s because they have to pay the full price. (It’s only going to go up under “gummint control” as 63 year old men are going to have to have pregnancy coverage.)

I appreciate all of you who called or wrote your elected (reminder: they are ELECTED, by US) representative. Our Texas delegates seem to have listened pretty well. So let’s all call them again and tell them we want out.

Sorry this column isn’t as funny as what I usually offer. If you want a laugh, try remembering that the guy who forced all this on us ran on a platform of being a centrist who’d listen to the people. I say, “Keep the change.”