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After one of his big show-downs, the prophet Elijah retreated (or ran!) to safety, with God guiding him to Mount Horeb. There, huddling in a cave, Elijah was feeling pretty sorry for himself. When God came to him and asked him what he was so upset about, Elijah began to list all the things that were going wrong.

(“I have been very jealous for the LORD, the God of hosts. For the people of Israel have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword, and I, even I only, am left, and they seek my life, to take it away.” 1 Kings 19:10)

Putting a Stop to Capitalism

I’m sure you’ve seen them on the news: those lazy, hippie-wannabies who are gumming up the commerce works of the United States by living like vagabonds and whining in the hopes that someone else will provide them with money they never worked for.

But enough about Congress.

Christmas (?)

The song says (and if you can’t trust a pop song, who can you trust?), “It’s the most wonderful time of the year!”

Ask Mister Man-Who-Knows

I see that the mailbag is almost full and, therefore, it is time to have another of our sessions wherein I answer those questions which you, the loyal reader, would have sent in if you could have found your pencil.

Q. Dear Mister Man-Who-Knows, my brother has started dating a girl I just can’t stand! I mean it: she’s crazy. I think she will be a very bad influence on my brother. So my question is: do you think these shoes go with this skirt?

A. Absolutely not.

Baseball in Texas

For most of the state, the only professional baseball talk has been of the Texas Rangers lately. I commend them on their second great season, but for a portion of the state, the thing that has been on our baseball minds has been the recent sale of the Houston Astros to Jim Crane and the league’s announcement that the Astros will be moving to the American League in 2013.

This, some people are saying, is a travesty. Ex-Astros are coming out to decry the move and people claiming to be loyal fans are saying they will never watch and Astros game again.

The Ancient Future

In fantasy and sci-fi, one of the things that has always fascinated me is the “lost civilization”. There’s just something about a society that rose to great heights then fell that captures my imagination. Sometimes we know what killed the society, sometimes we don’t, and both venues have their attractions.

Even in the “real” world, we speculate about what brought down the Mayans, or the Sumerians, or the Dallas Cowboys. We assume the answer for all three is probably Jerry Jones, but we’re not sure.

Lightbulb Moment

I remember an "art" project from grade school where we covered a light bulb in papier mache then, when it dried, slammed it against something to break the bulb, thus creating a maraca. Or maybe it was for social studies. At any rate, eventually you had a thing which, if shook, rattled and this was an important part of education.

Fried Pride!

This past weekend has made me proud to be from the great State of Texas. I’m not talking about the Texas Rangers. That’s good, too, I suppose (though I’m more of an Astros man, myself).

What has really made me proud of my Texas heritage this week has been the news from the Texas Vegetarian Fair: they served fried food.

Gettin' Jiggy with the Saw

Every once in a great while, I like to do a jigsaw puzzle. I hesitate to mention this not because I am ashamed, but because every time I have mentioned this in the past—whether in an article, a sermon, or just randomly at the mall—I have soon thereafter received a jigsaw puzzle as a gift.

If You Build It

Whether I walk or drive to work, I am required to go by two new restaurants that are being built (unless I go wildly out of my way). I am anxious to try them both … and I have no idea why.

One of them is part of a chain. I can tell you right now what the food will taste like (Answer: like all the other food served by that chain). There may be new floors and new walls but even if they have new workers, it won’t matter. How can I know that? Because when they were in that location before they had new workers every time I went in and the food was always exactly the same.

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